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This Week's Sermon From Reverend Jonny Wallet

(unabridged)

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Name:
reverendammit
Location:
External Services:
  • reverendammit@livejournal.com
Born in scenic Moscow Idaho. Son of migrant students. Brave pioneers in a double wide wide a saucy olive green stripe.

In the time of my father we raised rabbits for meat and pelt. We harnessed the awesome power of chicken wire; it dashed the bunnies' hopes.

In the time of my mother we did homestead in a double wide. She labored frequently at the Lumberjack Cafe with her friend Starlene; the lumberjacks there they did drink lots. Sometimes she would cry out for expensive shampoo.

In the time of my forebears my feet and knees pointed west. I was put in casts up to my hips that straightened them legs before Gawd. The diapers did not fit; the casts were stained yellow. Often I would bang them on the washing machine for fun.

And then one day, I believe it was the time of my brother, Garamond the Creamier, we rolled out of that town in a blue Mustang with a White Hard Top.

O yes. The Effluvient Pastor of These Lands Did come to the East Coast. Hooray. In time the Father of the Exalted One became strong and voted for Reagan. In time the Mother of the Powerful Missile got a perm and a cocker spaniel. In time the Brother of Mighty Everythingedness became pimply and studied liberal things in liberal places. The Himself lost his virginity despite the crutches. Their place as yuppies became secure.

But no Power can Halt the March of Evolution. After many miles on many roads, the Himselfimator became The Prophet with Size Eleven Shoes (With Mighty Orthotic Insoles)

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